No more babies

 |  Parenting, Personal

Back in February I asked my GP for referral for a sterilisation. I saw the consultant last Monday to confirm that I fully understood what was involved in the process and the fact that it was a permanent, non-reversible contraception etc etc. I was offered a newer, non-surgical procedure called Essure®, which basically involves inserting two small coils into the falopian tubes via the vagina, which cause scar tissue to form blocking off the tubes and preventing sperm from reaching an egg.

I agreed to the procedure, signed a consent form and was told I’d hear shortly for an appointment date. I went home expecting to be waiting for another few months. I mean, the NHS is brilliant but for elective procedures and non-urgent care it can be (rightly) slow.

Not so much… within two hours of getting home I was called by someone from the hospital to advise that a cancellation had been made, and could I make it in the following Tuesday (29th March). Holy shit batman. (Talking of which, the new Batman vs Superman? Pants.)

On Monday night, I lay in bed and had a little cry as I thought about what this procedure meant: no more growing babies in my tummy. No more breastfeeding cuddles. No more snuggling tiny humans to sleep by my side. But what reassured me about this little release was that I didn’t feel regret, or like I was having a last minute change of heart, but simply coming to terms with experiences I’ve been lucky enough to have and realising that although beautiful and life-changing and fulfilling, I am done.

No more babies.

Jem Turner +44(0)7521056376

11 comments so far

  1. Meggan said:

    I am also in Camp No More Babies but I haven’t done anything permanent yet. My vote is for a vasectomy though – I went through two major surgeries for our kids, he can go through one minor outpatient procedure to ensure no more. Heh.

    • Jem said:

      I would have been equally happy for Gaz to have a vasectomy, but men take so long to get around to doing anything I’d be on the pill for another 5 years ;)

      The Essure was really simple though. Took about 10-15 minutes and although I’ve had some cramping this week, it’s been no worse than a bad period. Hopefully that holds true for the foreseeable future.

    • Mindy said:

      My husband refuses. So I’m looking onto a permanent option too. My cousin has had this procedure done and has had no complcations at all.

  2. Katherine said:

    I’m glad that you got your appointment so quickly!

    I’ve personally been fighting tooth and nail for sterilization but because: A.) I’m under 30 and B.) Have never had children it is damn near impossible for me to find someone willing to do it.

    Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE childeren… when I can give them back when they start making noise or weird smells. :)

    • Arwen said:

      I’m in the same boat but I don’t even like children. Don’t get me wrong, I won’t be a dick to them, but I avoid interaction with children whenever possible.

      • Sarah said:

        Same here. I was going to look up this procedure but I expect I’m in a similar situation to all of you.

        It’s very frustrating that doctors think they know what is best for us. Ultimately, if we go through with the procedure and change our minds then that is our problem to deal with. I’d much prefer to be given the option at all.

        I was discussing this with my partner today and I’m assuming if a man of similar age went to get a vasectomy there’d be no such issue? I could be wrong though but I feel like it is one of those double standards.

  3. Arwen said:

    Meanwhile, I’m over here incredibly jealous of you because if I asked for a procedure like that, I’d be dismissed faster than you can say “no more babies,” because I don’t have any children and I’m the RIPE YOUNG AGE OF 31 WHAT IF I CHANGE MY MIND???!!!!1?!?!11

    Good luck though, I’m sure you will be fine. Just think of all the terrible parts of child rearing that you’ll never have to deal with again. :)

  4. Sarah said:

    I’m glad I decided to come and post a common on this post because it’s full of people with the same opinion and situation as me :D Perhaps we can create a ‘I’m a big girl, I can make up my mind about sterilisation’ group and try and get doctors to see that some of us women truly, honestly, cross my heart, don’t want children.

  5. Karl said:

    Look at it this way. We have 2, they’re loved, well cared for, want for nothing, and are just about right at times for ” can’t stretch my attention any more than 50/50″”. Heh. I could cheerfully do the baby thing again, but… no. Don’t want to. Told the kids as much, too. 1 of each, little stars that shine above my world, I’m more than happy. Never thought I’d have them if you recall, glad beyond measure that we did. They will always be our ” tiny humans”, as I keep saying to izz. Even at 21+. You should try sharing with them now… Little Mr ” rotating and teeth grinding”, and little Miss ” my duvet, sod you”… both very much your influence.. ha! :)