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Threenager

 |  Parenting

Isabel has officially turned into a threenager. A little premature, given that she’s not 3 ’til November, but I can think of no other explanation for the epic strops we’ve had over the past fortnight.

Last week we had the Worst Day Ever (oh so worthy of capitals) in which every SINGLE thing was a fight, battle or tantrum from the moment she got up til the moment she went to bed. Ask her if she wanted X or Y, she’d say X, you’d offer X and she’d strop for Y. Precocious and contrary. That was probably the day she learned the words “fuck sake” …

Today’s fun occurred towards the end of a trip to Tesco — because apparently the mutant chicken was not enough to make me want to trek all the way to Sainsbury’s instead — where she decided she wanted a box of Jaffa Cakes. I object to spending £3 odd on a box of half-stale cake topped with a miniscule layer of chocolate so I said no (don’t get me wrong, I like jaffa cakes, just not at that price); I offered the 85p “Everyday Value” knock-offs instead.

The box wasn’t blue enough, unlike the “better ones”, and when I said “it’s those or nothing”, she didn’t actually mean “nothing” even though that’s what she said. Cue the absolute screaming eebie jeebies all the way to the till, as we paid and packed, to the car, strop getting in the car, scream scream scream all the way home. (Oh, the joys of having to strip down her car seat because she was that pissed off she had an accident.)

And this week marks the start of her reduced nursery hours now that I’m working from home. What have I done?!

Jem Turner jem@jemjabella.co.uk +44(0)7521056376

8 comments so far

  1. wonkotsane said:

    I’d like to reassure you that it gets better … but it doesn’t. #1 was throwing a wobbly yesterday over something or other (usually about how much of an embarrassment everyone is) and #2 is currently banging doors and stomping up and down the stairs because he’s been made to come inside for being an evil little so and so to #3 and #4. So that’s 14 and 12 years old and still no respite. On the bright side, at least it’s only one child throwing a wobbler … for now.

  2. Nina Amelia said:

    Fun times! We’re already having a good start at The Terrible Two’s so I’m with you on the screaming marathons. And our W is even well behaved (I can’t believe I’m using that word) compared to alot of others at the same age :s

  3. Mumblies said:

    Did you ever wonder why I ended up grey haired and crabby? Take a look at Izz hehe.

    She’s too old to be a baby now, but too young to be a kid at proper school which will occupy that intelligent mind of hers long enough for her to actually tire herself out. Time will fix this.

    She will however eventually stop the temper tantrums, she’s just seeing how far she can push before you and Daddy reach the point of no return. Some days she will be an angel and you wonder what on earth made you think she could ever be a threenager, and then there will be days you wonder why did you ever want kids.

    I freely admit I am no expert on children or how to raise them any better than you can but I did find that when you lot were little it helped a great deal if I used bargaining and yes even blackmail. Some suggestions are ‘If you stop screaming now then Mummy will play such and such a game just as soon as she’s removed herself from the Oliverhoover. If you don’t pick up your toys Mummy will take them to the recycling and throw them away, If you stop that nonsense then we can have ice cream for pudding today’ etc

    When she screams in public just blank it, don’t make a fuss or even bother to ask her to stop, she will eventually realise that nobody is paying any attention and stop herself.

    It gets easier to cope, honest :)

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