Now this one really tickled my funny bone..
Bomb squad officers called in to blow up a suspicious package found it contained a packet of chocolate buttons and a vibrator.
(source)
I feel sorry for the poor sod who was sat at home waiting for their new toy. Oh, and Karl said something about adding a “bang” to their evening (*groan*).
29 May at 10:14 pm
Oi! At least I didn’t say “Only after they used it”, in response to this bit: Cheeky. Groan at my jokes, would you? Tch.
29 May at 10:30 pm
Lmao! That is actually hilarious. I feel sorry for the person waiting for it too!
29 May at 11:07 pm
I know that some men might be threatened by the idea of a vibrator, but this is possibly taking the idea of removing that threat just a little too far.
29 May at 11:23 pm
Of course, it’s company policy never to imply ownership in the event of a dildo… always use the indefinite article: “a” dildo… never… “your” dildo.
30 May at 12:42 am
Haha, imagine having your dildo turned into a big news story. How embarassing!
30 May at 1:16 am
This news just makes this day even better. We had a “bomb” in my locker at school. Stupid metronome. It just had to be in there ticking…
30 May at 1:33 am
If you’re going to buy a vibrator, you don’t buy chocolate buttons. You buy rich, expensive ice cream, maybe, but more likely you buy pornography. Honestly, who even eats chocolate buttons!
30 May at 6:04 am
@ Mike, Meet the Parents reference? :P
30 May at 6:05 am
It’s obviously time for me to go to sleep, because I meant to put in “Fight Club,” but for some odd reason Meet the Parents came out.. Weird… D:
30 May at 10:31 am
Yeah.. well better safe than sorry. Besides, some vibrators (I hear) may look lethal :P
30 May at 10:36 am
There’s a pun in there somewhere, but I’m too hungover to find it.
30 May at 10:37 am
Also, they must have shit bombs. I thought they’d have to blow it to smithereens…
30 May at 10:59 am
OMG! That’s just down the road from me! Hasland is where a load of my family live hahaha…
30 May at 11:13 am
Ahahah! Oh dear Lord that beats the article on thrush I found today by a mile. Does this sudden outbreak of ridicule-able crap mean I should keep up with BBC now?
30 May at 11:24 am
Aw, that’s cute. It reminds me of a problem we often have at work. I work in the gas detection industry, and our gas detectors have alarms on them which go off when they’re faulty, or when they’ve detected gas. One company has a beeping gas detector returned, and they didn’t know what it was, so they evactuated the whole building… Another time, a guy working in F1 had to take some very pricey equipment as hand luggage. He accidentally left it in the airport, and they blew it up. It was worth just over one hundred grand. Nice.
30 May at 12:55 pm
How funny would it be for the person who sent it though..! I find it highly amusing that they shut down the street for an hour haha – allll because of a vibrator. Gimme a couple of days and I’ll have a good one-liner for you. I’m thinking something to do with the actual ‘groaning’ ahah hmm..
30 May at 3:09 pm
So, when are you going to go pick up your stuff from the police station, Jem? I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist. ;D
30 May at 3:57 pm
@mike: You stole my quote idea :( One has to wonder why they didn’t just xray it to see what was inside…
30 May at 5:53 pm
I wonder if the person who ordered this package will step forward in the media and claim the package now where everyone is talking about it. It must be a little embarrassing though.
30 May at 7:15 pm
Hahahaha! My day has been made.
30 May at 11:44 pm
Anyone heard of x-rays here?
31 May at 6:02 pm
Sheesh, good thing there wasn’t a tiny kitten inside or something. Couldn’t they have investigated it a bit more before blowing it up? Seems a bit extreme.
31 May at 7:55 pm
I wondered where my dildo and chocolate got to. :(