Smells Like Diamonds

Bold, a company that produces soap powder (to wash your clothes with), started advertising a “new premium range of luxuriously perfumed super sensory laundry products” several months ago. The television adverts tell us that we too could smell like an infusion of white lotus flower and diamond.

I don’t get it. I’ve sniffed my jewellery; it doesn’t have a distinctive odour that I could pick up on. So how, pray tell, does one manage to infuse the scent of diamonds into a poncy washing tablet that probably costs twice the price of standard Tesco cheap-as-chips non-biological washing powder?

It’s a bloody con, that’s what it is, and Karl’s fed up of me shouting at the TV about it so I thought I’d write it down and get it out once and for all.

Dirty Slimy Buggers

You know you’re officially insane when you find yourself wandering around the garden in your slippers, clutching eggshells and a bag of cheap porridge oats, all the while screeching “I’ll get you, ya buggers”.

I’m in Cuil

Cuil, apparently pronounced “cool”, is the hot topic in the tech/Internet industry at the moment. It’s a new search engine bragging about a bigger index than our beloved Google.

I couldn’t possibly begin to second guess their claims because in truth I know bugger all about search engines. However, I do know that where Cuil misses some, it’s got me no problem. Page 1 for Jem as per Google, and “7,273 results for jemjabella”.

Obviously I’m just too cuil. (My humour, it’s wasted on you guys I tell ya.)

Wearing the Pants Well

Tess has done a write-up in the same vein as my Handling the Critics post called Handling the Pants Awards. It’s cute, and I literally laughed out loud, but it also makes a few serious points. Of course, the people who should read it probably never will, but that’s irrelevant.

Incidentally, I’ve had a draft sat in my control panel for well over a month in which I discuss ending the Pants Award series. I can’t bring myself to publish it though, and every time I think I’m done, I see another site that I think would be perfect for them. I do know that whatever happens, I need to do something to increase the productivity of each award, because what’s the point if they don’t actually do any good? (And no, comic relief is not the purpose, it’s just an added bonus.)

All suggestions welcome, of course.

zomg regex

This is probably the most complicated thing I’ve ever had to work out in my entire life:

/^MK([1-9]|1[0-5]|17|19|77) [0-9]{1,2}[A-Z]{1,2}$/i