Feb 06 2008
hot boob hypnosis
Any idea what hot boob hypnosis is? No, me either. Yet, it’s one of a few thousand phrases used to find my website last month, and number 9 of a handful I collected while in hysterics last night, especially for your enjoyment (and possible bewilderment). I’ve blanked the swear words, for the sake of the minors.
- grandma and grampa having a good f…
- bed rest sore testicles
- under age f…ing
- “+”4 year old” +whore”
- dirty breast jokes
- wearing my sister’s dresses
- auntie sucks little nephew stories
- find girl friend united kingdom
- hot boob hypnosis
- daughter dresses like a whore
- my online friend doesn’t want to give her phone number
- what age should girls start wearing mini shirts
- imply ownership in the event of a dildo
- pictures of soiled pants
- my brother is stealing my bras
- is im preventing kids from learning how to write propper gramer
That last one is my absolute favourite :3 I’ll give virtual cookies to anyone who can recall which post each of these “apply” to (what the searchers will have found in their results).
Warning
This post is over 6 months old. This means that, despite my best intentions, it may no longer be accurate. Age, motherhood, experience, loss... these things have all changed me from when this blog was started back in the heady (ha) days of my youth.
As much as I would like to go back and edit 10 years of archives to provide an insight into the 'me' of now — to update coding snippets and revise website advice — it would probably take years to do so (by which point I'd have to start again!) This would defeat the point of keeping these archives anyway.
Please take these posts for what they are: a brief look into my past, my history, my journey.
34 Responses so far
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I gotta admit, hot boob hypnosis sounds very interesting. I’m pretty sure there’s someone being hypnotized as we speak.
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Haha, those are hilarious. I don’t know about which post it relates to, but “imply ownership in the event of a dildo” is definitely a Fight Club reference. :D
When a suitcase vibrates, then the throwers gotta call the police. Nine times out of ten it’s an electric razor, but every once in a while… it’s a dildo. Of course it’s company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo… always use the indefinite article “a dildo”, never “your dildo”.
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14 would have to do with your Pants Awards… and 16 is obviously in reference to Barbi-Lee. *has to think about the rest*
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Lol, I always wonder how search queries like that can lead to totally innocent posts. It happens to me, too!
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I think Hot Boob Hypnosis is like that scene from Idiocracy where Frito explains just how much he likes sex while waiting for the Costco shuttle.
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Aaaah, thanks for that Cine, it makes more sense now ;)
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imply ownership in the event of a dildo
^ that did it. I’m now laughing incoherently. Which posts? Oh I’m not THAT much of a stalker… besides it’s 11:30 pm so I’m off to bed. Tee-hee: yes admit it. That dildo is yours alright. =D -
Oh oh! Hot boob hypnosis has got to be when someone has such a hot pair of knockers, that you get hypnotised just looking at them!
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Hot boob hypnosis is when you see a pair of hot boobs. You can’t help but stare at them, and it’s as if they’re hypnotising you.
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#16′s googled result I think had to do with this post: http://moourl.com/q9gcp
Which posts? Oh I’m not THAT much of a stalker… besides it’s 11:30 pm so I’m off to bed.
I guess I am the stalker. Hehe. xD -
LOL. Who wants to search about old people having sex?
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haha, if I google hot boob hypnosis, this blog post is now the first result.
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ROF to tha L
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Wow it looks like a lot of people are looking for incest and underage porn.
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Well, they led to /this/ post. And the ‘pictures of soiled pants’ also linked to the Pixelfx.
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Odd! I find this one “my online friend doesn’t want to give her phone number” particularly funny XD It’s interesting to know the weird things other people search for.
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my brother is stealing my bras
Ew, that’s kind of gross…what age should girls start wearing mini shirts
LOL, what’s a mini shirt? I think they meant mini skirt. But if I remember correctly, you had a post talking about how your boobs are too big for your shirts so they aren’t long enough or something (unless I’m thinking of someone else’s blog)? That might apply to that post =P -
It’s always amusing to go searching in one’s search term stats. I’m still trying to figure out how people used some of the terms they did to get to some of my sites.
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Hot boob hypnosis is what happens when you see a pair of really good tits. XD ……..oh damn, they beat me to it. Cheeky bitches. :(
auntie sucks little nephew stories
That is so wrong. o_____Opictures of soiled pants
Ew. Gives “keep it in your pants” a whole new meaning. :P -
find girl friend united kingdom Lucky you Jem, look out for weird valentine’s day cards!
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” Wow it looks like a lot of people are looking for incest and underage porn. ” It’s sadly all too common in referral logs. A long time ago, I got a web browser shut down that (when you clicked a button) redirected you to illegal content. http://www.vitalsecurity.org/2006/04/yapbrowser-serves-up-zango-andchild.html (Link is safe!) Since that collection of writeups, I *always* have dubious things in my search logs – and I *know* they’re not simply looking for the Yapbrowser story…
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@Bobbi-lee: it’s actually scary how many porn related searches there are in my logs. Be afraid, be very afraid.
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The vibrator/dildo one would be because of the post you made about the uk post office screwing up an order… I only vaguely remember it but there was a joke about someone waiting for a vibrator to arrive in the mail. And if i recall someone replied with the fightclub line above :) Cookie me!
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Pfft, you’ve got to get the other 15 right first Mat! ;)
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Ewwww…some of those people need to be locked up! :o
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Hot boob hypnosis = hypnotizing boobs until they get uh … from cold to warm to hot. Errr. Okay. Miserable attempt at humour. I used to have weird search engine queries leading to my site back in 2002-2003 as well. Until I blocked off search engine access to my entries. :P
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The dildo one is totally my reply from a while back. I don’t remember the post. As for hot boob hypnosis… it’s something I encounter daily. Some of the girls on my course… man… I could break out in a wanking fit right in the middle or a lecture.
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Lmao. Jemjabella is a perverted porn site.
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Lol! I’m sure the “pictures of soiled pants” leads to any one of your Pants Awards posts. This makes me wonder what kind of search phrases my site comes up in. I haven’t checked my stats in a while.
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Man, I thought some of mine were bad, lol! The creepy one I get the most often is “milking a human female” … and now you can get that one, too! Joy!
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@ Brigitte: The creepiest one I’ve gotten is “cow fckin” More likely from Barbilee’s responses on my blog *rolls eyes*
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lol! some of those are too funny ~_~
my online friend doesn’t want to give her phone number
that one makes me think of all the lonely WoW boys who’ve tried to talk me into giving my number. poor little basement virgins. -
1. grandma and grampa having a good f… (I do not want to know about this!) 2. bed rest sore testicles (Bwhahaha!) 3. under age f…ing (Perv) 4. “+”4 year old” +whore” (Mega perv) 5. dirty breast jokes (Do they mean dirty breasts in jokes or a dirty joke about breasts?) 6. wearing my sister’s dresses (Nice) 7. auntie sucks little nephew stories (Lol wut) 8. find girl friend united kingdom (Good luck, buddy) 9. hot boob hypnosis (Still have NO idea) 10. daughter dresses like a whore (Which daughter doesn’t these days? :P) 11. my online friend doesn’t want to give her phone number (Erm, maybe because you’re a freak?) 12. what age should girls start wearing mini shirts (Girls should NEVER wear mini skirts, however women can) 13. imply ownership in the event of a dildo (Whhhhaaat?) 14. pictures of soiled pants (Got to love fetishes) 15. my brother is stealing my bras (Go beat him up or something) 16. is im preventing kids from learning how to write propper gramer (Hmm, let’s have a think. Yes.)
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Hot Boob Hypnosis – no idea. Whoever thought of that might be a pervert genius.
Lmao. Jemjabella is a perverted porn site.
LOL.
